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< / > Nervy May 13, 2005 *~* 4:44 p.m. Home home home. I am going home tomorrow, which is only mildly worrisome. My nose is all closed up, so that shouldn't be an issue. Amanda gets home about the same time I do, so she'll come over and say Hi and maybe take me out to Steak and Shake cause that's what she promised. And then my mommy will take me to Starbucks on Sunday morning, and then I'll get a haircut and be so spiffy and then I'll sit in my room and realize that I left everyone behind and maybe I'll cry. Probably not for a bit, until the loneliness really sets in. I'm on the car insurance starting Monday, woo hoo! so that means I can drive drive drive and go places and listen to music and job search and be real cute and maybe run in the mornings and be really really content. And then I'll be a normal girl by August. I'm excited, in a terrified sort of way, if that makes sense. Or something like that. Four forty four. That's nice. Make a wish. . . I'm really really hopeful. Nervous, but this time around with the going home I don't have any sketchy secrets, so the transition should be smoother. No Christmas holiday jolly pressure, no cold miserable weather (hot miserable weather instead) and endless days and weeks and months. Gm is reading out loud to me from the Hitchiker's Guide. I like it when he reads, even though I also relish poking him and trying to distract him. I am a very demanding girlfriend, I think. It will be weird to be away from him, though probably a healthy balancing factor too. I keep telling myself this, knowing that it's mostly true. My stomach sort of aches, in a warm fake hungry sort of way since I'm all stretched out on the bed. I think it might be nerves too. This is a random and not so good entry because I am really wired and simultaneously tired. Imma gonna go. |